Fruit Machine Chat

Gambo, two months ago I would have agreed with you on this one. Quicker to force than R2R.
Now let me just stipulate a few things about this machine.
The rips.

There are three.

i) The 'number cruncher'
ii) The 'give us a clue'
iii) Using your gamble strip repeatedly to boost up steps etc

Right number i) is so much tighter than it should be, number ii) only awarded when it's pretty much 'there' anyway. Number iii) Sometimes gets you an extra place up the cash ladder than 'wot' it was going to give BUT once it has had enough of you on the board, it'll spin out FIRST press.
Also once you have three steps, or five masks closeish, you're asking for trouble unless it's a £25376526325 board.

So what don't I like about this machine? The total out and out control freakedness of the tightness of the boringness of the crapulence and total ineptitude of the.......let me try and explain.

Before I do, I know Mark and the Northampton lads are ripping up Leicester playing these and Hi Lo Silvers as they have the emptiers for both machines. Mark, PM me the emptier for Star Wars please.

1) It takes too long for boards
2) When I'm getting spin out and I want to get the whole painful process over with, why can't I gamble straight away, why do I have to listen to shit repetitive sound samples, whilst I drum the button endless times? There should be a button labelled 'I can see that only pay roll and burning cash have been offerred along with a £2.90 cashpot, I am pressing this button to end the misery and tedium of using three steps to get to a red number that'll get me to a mask that'll give me a bonus for a lucky seven that'll spin me to SPIN OUT first go. The reason I am doing this is that I feel compelled to force out the STAR WARS feature as this board cost me £20, so why is it a fucking £3 board eh? Is it because Andrew got the £48 top so it now feels compelled to take that back in two boards? Great gameplay. '
If they can't fit all that onto one button, then they shouldn't be churning out these games.

LISTEN PLEASE!!!! BARCREST DESIGNER'S or IGT or WHOEVER YOU ARE NOW. LISTEN PLEASE. SSSSSSSHHHHHHH! LISTEN, OK IF YOU DON'T LISTEN YOU'LL ALL BE ON LITTER DUTY. SHUSSSSSSSSH. QUIET PLEASE!!! ANYONE WHO SPEAKS NOW IS ON TUESDAY DETENTION. OK?

You program the hi/lo to be controlled and the feature board random.

You get a mask(s) you have every chance of getting a jackpot. Balance it. You may need a couple more spin outs. Let the player have gambles on 1,2,3,10,11,12 be a bit more cautious with 4,9 and controlling with 5,6,7,8.

On 88% You have a seperate pot which cushions blows from 'rippage' and a seperate pot for repeat value from cash/Star Wars. You have a very small pot that guarantees a free £70 on rare occasions.

When it's behind what do you do?

You give a board within £10 and offer a potential of 65% of that board value back to the player. The hi/lo is controlled and you may allowr one mask with some rarity but via a controlled, predetermined board. Usually the masks will start high up. Note in all instances features will still play out as in the current Star Wars, it's only the number spin that is random. It'll still hold onto Star Wars until last.


Your average player LOVES uncertainty within controlled parameters.

WHY? Because it's fun.

Players of all ilks can detect when they're playing something engaging and with a fair chance of 'getting lucky' as a pose to some prescripted boring crap tighter than a duck's arse anti-everything piece of shit.


Do a Monopoly ffs with a Monopoly board and if you get a board it's every chance at a jackpot, totally random. Obviously the % is still controlled, of it's not there then offer a £3 cash repeater. Think Monoply 60 meets original m1a Monop, but the roll of reel is random. If you see exchange for Monopoly off your single bars, go for it, it may be jackpot. None of this, oh it's only giving turbo cash, therefore it's a £4 board.

Or cash pot £1-£1.30-£1.60-£2 blatant £2 board shit.


Listen I could program a Star Wars game or a Monopoly game or whatever that would totally piss over what is out there at the moment.

Listen I could program a Star Wars game or a Monopoly game or whatever that would totally piss over what is out there at the moment.

Couldnt we all

Now then Mr George I see this is beginning to knark you as much as Hot property was.

JG wrote:
1) It takes too long for boards

It has got the horrible new crest board costs in it but nowhere near as bad as CA or O,O,O

JG wrote: 2) When I'm getting spin out and I want to get the whole painful process over with, why can't I gamble straight away, why do I have to listen to shit repetitive sound samples, whilst I drum the button endless times? There should be a button labelled 'I can see that only pay roll and burning cash have been offerred along with a £2.90 cashpot, I am pressing this button to end the misery and tedium of using three steps to get to a red number that'll get me to a mask that'll give me a bonus for a lucky seven that'll spin me to SPIN OUT first go.

But at least your punters will feel like they're getting a bit of play for your money. So you prefer a hot property that takes £15 for a board only to give plus streak symbol then ? for a Cash or bust that gives bust???

JG wrote: The reason I am doing this is that I feel compelled to force out the STAR WARS feature as this board cost me £20, so why is it a fucking £3 board eh? Is it because Andrew got the £48 top so it now feels compelled to take that back in two boards? Great gameplay. '
If they can't fit all that onto one button, then they shouldn't be churning out these games.

I've never had a Star wars cost more than £10 for a board and generally they've been quite fair as in well under a fiver per board. You take on a DOND that Andrew has just spawned a flat £35 MS off the phone game and it'll have it back with just 1 board.

My point on these was that I feel they aren't worth being ignored if there's 1 in a pub where you are, I certainly wouldn't go out the way for 1 but there is 2 in pubs that I go in every weekend and have done alright with them. Compared with my last 2 efforts on R2R's which where both either SS or through the £5 block off the 1sr couple of boards and both cost £60+ for the top. 1 did £35 the other £45 but then both died.

My other options for a gamble in this area are Popeye/Cops n robbers video/Big Deal/Italian Job/Some crest test(O,O,O clone but with 3 discs) and a poker face. Oh and a manic miner.
Not a great machine Star Wars but better of a very bad bunch.

so there is an emptier for hilo isnt it just the rip any idea what it is
as ive never had any empty
same as star wars thats always full obviously know one knows it down here same as me
would love to know thou

Sharky if I knew the emptier for Star Wars or HLS I wouldn't be sat here now, or maybe I would, but only to see if anyone else knew the emptier.

I've had a Star Wars chew £20 for no board. It is beginning to nark me. Short term playability IS better than Hot property, although they're both dire imo. However at least Hot Property can go 'onk 'onk 'onk GATW red uncles whilst this will only ever give invincible if someone has forced it or £20billion has been cycled through by the timidest player collecting 50p.
Yeah CA I saw £30 for a board, Oche*3 best part of £20, sure it can do more.
Generally under a fiver a board?!??! What?!? Is this an outskirts box fresh pub? Par for the course is £10 worth of useless stoppas, roll in numbers for a red rebel alliance.
Andrew always leaves it dialling after paying £300 for a flasher+£150 rundown.
Andrew leaves Star Wars comatose after playign all out for the £52 streak.

A month ago I would have agreed on some of your sentiments, now I won't budge. I'm as stubborn as Mark Pyne. This machine is pure diarrhoeoa.

I don't see how you guys are finding them so ready.

This could get interesting How about several Dark Knights off the bonus, plenty of lines dropping in (Although pretty shit offerings really) Cashpots reguarly going upto £6+. people just don't push them so they're there for value in the right pub. Granted I've only played the 1 in the arcade once and that was because it was full. But I've had no nightmare sessions, no rediculous board costs, No fixed patterns like your R2R 4 shots left with SS and Extra zone land on 2 shots get extra zone then get extra zone. Nothing I'm just won over with the fairness of the force.

No doubt I'll be back on sunday after doing my bollocks in both of them

I personally find star wars pretty pointless, alot of them you will put £8+ in for a dead board...

Another lot of them cost £40-50 for £40-50 back

A few you blag £35-55 off £10-20 in

A couple you lose a stack when they do a £10 board but actually are dead and then proceed to do £2-5 boards for the next £50+

All in all, money back or there abouts, the machine is worthless imo, although in comparison to such bfms as hot property it's probably the better as that particular machine is an overall loss maker.

People get these occasional blag cheap pots/£50tops etc. and are thus overating the machine, it's bog standard; same as road to riches; I'm still tied as to which is better, as I find them both worthless.

[quote="ob"]I personally find star wars pretty pointless, alot of them you will put £8+ in for a dead board...

Another lot of them cost £40-50 for £40-50 back

A few you blag £35-55 off £10-20 in

A couple you lose a stack when they do a £10 board but actually are dead and then proceed to do £2-5 boards for the next £50+

All in all, money back or there abouts, the machine is worthless imo, although in comparison to such bfms as hot property it's probably the better as that particular machine is an overall loss maker.

People get these occasional blag cheap pots/£50tops etc. and are thus overating the machine, it's bog standard]

Completely agree Ob - they really don't have a point, do they ... it's the Star Wars theme that compels people to put money in it.

hmm ive not been doing too bad recently forcing for one of the rips, I agree they are the best of a bad bunch, but I would certainly not go into a pub solely for one.

I collected 8 quid on the cash ladder on star wars tonight, it gave the bonus chance for 20 quid, and again for another 4, this was after i had an IM go for flat, new machine just replaced a HLS, the other machine in the pub is a new Rainbow Riches! Nice variation on machines there!!

the bonus chance must literally have odds of 50/1 to give.

Cheapest to date. £9 for the skill feature which did £45 streak, I was also rudely interupted filming it by somebody asking me if I was a player.
At 1st I thought it might be the BFK!! then I realised, he'd of spotted an internet player before he'd even stepped foot in the pub

my mate likes these, but then again he liked R2R - in essense it's a bit like playing a poor man's chipped cluedo, but the chance of you blagging it cheap are lower and also they don't roll...

Of course you can get results on it, but then you get losses on them, they often btw gaz cost over £10 for a board, this generally means they are on their arse, but not necessarily. He plays them all the time and has had £30+ and even £50+ losses, although the latter is from reforcing.

I'm sure JG you appreciate that you "could" get the skill feature for cheap, but what my mate and other such people who like this type of machine usually forget is that it doesn't take a player to kill these type of machines! The amount of times he's said, oh that walk of wealth will be flying in there - not true - munters take their phones and burn it off!

He summed it up nicely with, well they are usually gonna be £3/4 boards to start, its one of those either you wanna take it on, (and the insuing gamble), or not.....

Personal choice there then, not really sure if long run profit's per machine would really merit the time spent playing them.

Agreed the only pattern I've seen so far is the board costs. Today I had 3 boards from me 1st fiver (1 of which gave a £2 safe) my 9th quid was me 5th feature. It then took £11 for the next board to check it was dead
These defo don't roll it's just down to what Star wars gives basically.

must be stored up value coming out on them repeats