Fruit Machine Chat

BLARO!

Sorry that was meant to be a blarp.


It's not actually a SMTM love thread, but hey! no! It is!

I was in a Tenpin and played a Mummy. £10 for the first board, got to a £5 and collected. Then I paid £2 for the next board and got toggly woggly hot rocks for a fiver. To leave £2 down after paying £10 for the first board was acceptable but not wonderful. I don't particularly love this machine actually. Not because it can play more cunning muntling tricking dummies than its cousins, but because it's basically never that close to being ready. Perhaps in a sleepy old man's pub, but not anywhere within a 50 mile radius of anything else where I play.

Forget SMTM, who cares? This is the proper story.


THE SNAKEZ LOVE THREAD.

I put £3 into a Snakez. 7 nudges needed for blue sevens, somehow got to 5 nudges......then 6 nudges......two white bloopers.........LUCKY SEVEN(I'm on an eight). Lower..................BOOOOOSSSHHSHLESQOODLE for the higher number. Didn't want me to gamble to £15. Two reds I think. SQOOODGE SQOOODGE at the start.

£2 in and what was it? Hmmmm just one SQOOOODGE (one red) and I think a choose a trail onto cherries, no mixed sevens, that was it. So mixed sevens, one sqoodge, probably on money belt which ain't much use as 'ow am I getting back down there ffs? What is red money belt? Jackpot? I don't think I've ever taken it. Nah, it has to be £4 doesn't it?
Anyway forget red money belt, this isn't about a pointless red money belt. So I sqooodled and woodled about thinking hmmmmm probably a £5 board. Landed on a SAFE for £4. Thinking nice, that's ok, had some colours, a skill widget, lost and extra life and then I'm one below superhold and I've managed to fluke up all the colours. RED..........green



























WHITE




















and BLOOP





















All lit for a SUPER MEGA BANGA WANGA BLOOPA WOOOPA



which was Toggle Woggle thing



There was a <<whippetyy>> in the bloop so had a quick look at SH (why?) and £25 wasn't there even though mixedy seveny poos were on the line. Anyway rythmically blooped the whizziwhoopla up to the lurid SNAKEZ logo. No pressure. I mean I really don't want a £2 safe and then a SQOOOGLEWOOGLE next go, not even a BANG onto blue sevens consolation do I? Hmmm? Ehh?


I had also missed a taxi onto revolver and POOOTLED onto superstreak on 30p game instead. I know this is usually £30-£35 on red game, but I seem to remember more like £19.60 on blue game. So BANG stepped to a 12 and got 12 strikes for £20. Pah. Had to leave it there. Bailed. Anyway that was the other machine. Talking about the machine next to it there so don't get confused. Back to SNAKEZ..........


Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhooooooooooooohaaaaaaaaaaaaahoooohoa
Shamone

(That's the noise of the top feature)



Yeah I mean it wasn't dead dead dead, but it didn't seem hyper alive either. I mean you can get cancel widgets, minimal sqoodges and general run around sub £7 square wriggley piggleys on a £5 board. Granted the toggle IMO means it was sort of probably more there than it let on, but hey! It felt like a MASSIVE RIP.

£35 and it's a YES NO booongabanga type thing.


BO SELECTA BANG! YESSSSSSS oh my GOD.


I was 99% sure this was flat £35 territory.




JPM snakez wiggle around flava. £70.




YES NO
























































YES!!!!!!!!!!!



£WOWSERS!!!!



£!)%, £105 top on the beast. Stored repeat value? Slightly different to teh showy, showy of an Invincible.



Only ever had £35 from 'ripped' tops and £70 from 'taken quite long to go in' tops.


A £105, seemingly out of the blue. Sweet. Different league to a snaeky hold or a numbers in view on 50p that amazingly gives £25 nudge win when you @@know@@ it's not that happy.




I've never hated Snakez, just thought it was, well, you know, not as flavasome as, well you know which ones. Can't say anything now can you? Can't really. Said too much there reallly. Trying not to give away clues and flavas, but some Industry person probably reading that and making notes to quel playabilty.




Note for tomorrow's meeting: Stop £105 tops from £5 in. That must not happen.

As always, a brilliant read.

7 Snake'z' around here - haven't dabbled with them for some weeks.

Can be extremely dodgy but on the odd occasion can be a joy. £5 in one on Sunday to be offered B7's, great sign, another £5 in for another set of B7's that this time gambled £25, then top row and just as I was expecting the usual 8 with a 1 on to take me down the snake, bloop (had to throw one in JG) 2, to take me to the end for the full £105!

For a while I have not felt the supreme satisfaction of a full £105 yet alone a decent profit off a Snakez. After a couple more quick fire features I left with £100 clear profit, a rarety but extremely satisfying.

what you should have done was to reverse the gamble on the board and force force force for those red features, after all, if you havent got all red features, you wont make any money!!

oh dear, just relised, snakes is a trail based machine, so getting all the red features must be a nightmare, no spinny pressy button to change what you're on? hmm must be a pain in the arse that.

I played one last week, after telling myself never again, and it was opening up after about 15 in. Ok, let's get the piss taken for the next half hour and maybe scrape a tenner profit! Next board goes to 35 square and I collect, board after that sails to top and does 105..

Err I'm playing a snakes here right? Thats not on the script.

Anyways, had to clear a £8 IOU but still left me £107 to the good.

On a snakes!!!