Brain Of Britain

harry2 · Post by **harry2** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 10:01 am

Brain of Britain

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
Contestant: Homosexuals.
Jeremy Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Jamie Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
Stewart White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm
Stewart White: Correct And if you're not weak, you're...?
Contestant: Strong.
Stewart White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis
Stewart White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy ?
Contestant: France.
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris.

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: - Prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party.

BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )
DJ Mark: For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoyne: What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant: Goosey?

GWR FM ( Bristol )
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963 ?
Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO�MANCHESTER)
Phil: What's 11 squared?
Contestant: I don't know.
Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY
Richard: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
Contestant: Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND JUDY
Richard: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er. .. ..
Richard: He makes bread . . .
Contestant: Er . ....
Richard: He makes cakes . . .
Contestant: Kipling Street?

LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain .

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Question: What is the world's largest continent?
Contestant: The Pacific.

ROCK FM ( PRESTON )
Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.
Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
Steve Le Fevre: What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
Contestant: Magna Carta?

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
James O'Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... ER. ER ... Three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL )
Chris Searle: In which European country isMount Etna?
Caller: Japan.
Chris Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er ..... Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israellast?
Contestant (long pause): Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Daryl Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland ?
Daryl Denham

helpfully) It's a bad line. Did you say Israel ?
Contestant: No.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
Phil Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant: Er. ... ..
Phil Wood: It's got two syllables . . . Kor . .
Contestant: Blimey?
Phil Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . . ..
Contestant: (Silence)
Phil Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
Contestant: Walked?

THE VAULT
Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant: Nostalgia.

LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)
Presenter: What religion was Guy Fawkes?
Contestant: Jewish.
Presenter: That's close enough.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesus.

Mattb · Post by **Mattb** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 10:13 am

Some of those i'd love to believe as true, but they sound suspiciously made up!

harry2 · Post by **harry2** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 10:17 am

Family Fortunes:

Host: Name a dangerous race ?

Contestant : ARABS !!!

steveseagull · Post by **steveseagull** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 11:30 am

harry2 wrote:Family Fortunes:

Host: Name a dangerous race ?

Contestant : ARABS !!!

FF again. Host: Name a bird with a long neck?
muppet: Naomi Campbell?

jpfuk · Post by **jpfuk** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 11:45 am

Scott · Post by **Scott** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 9:54 am

His family did'nt looked pleased, the one in the blue jacket is seething.

steveseagull · Post by **steveseagull** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:23 am

I noticed that as well Eddie. Do you reckon there was some animosity on his part for not getting to compete himself in the final round?

Scott · Post by **Scott** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:27 am

I would'nt be very happy either to be honest, Turkey????? wtf.

it was a good answer for the stuffed question though.

steveseagull · Post by **steveseagull** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:40 am

All i can think happened is that the contestant, at some point before he is asked the questions, either hears in the background or sees out of the the corner of his eye the word 'chicken' and so is focused on 'turkey' regardless of the question.
By the time he gets to say 'turkey' you can sense relief from him. Serves him right for trying to gain from cheating and taking advantage of the games shortfalls & glitches . . . ermmm

Scott · Post by **Scott** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:44 am

Something i would never do....... honest.

Istenem · Post by **Istenem** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:52 am

a friend of mine employed this guy. his daughter went first and whispered turkey to him as they crossed in the studio.

steveseagull · Post by **steveseagull** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 2:56 pm

This week's Dumb Britain contributions from Private Eye.

Wogan's Perfect Recall, C4

Terry Wogan: Which season is said to start on solstice day in December?

Contestant 1: Spring?

TW: In December, for God's sake?

Contestant 2: Summer?

The Weakest Link, BBC1

Anne Robinson: The 1959 film by Alfred Hitchcock featuring two points of the compass in it's name was called North by North.... what?

Contestant: South.

AR: Which first name is shared by a singer with the surname O'Connor and an actress with the surname Cusack?

Contestant: Des.