Fruit Machine Chat

what do you have whilst out playing?, my favourite is a steak bake pasty from Greggs!!, cant seem to eat pies as there is too much pastery!

Pasty for me, don't really like pies a lot. Greggs do that amazing sausage, baked bean and cheese melt though which is sublime.

They don't do that around here Matt, but they do do do doo doo do did a cheese and onion pasty thing for 59 bloomin' pence. Offer now expired, so don't even think about coming over here for a cheap pasty and a chance to empty everything whilst my back is turned.

Well playa food. Let's see......

Back in the day in Leicester, back in the day.....Charles Street, used to be a shop that'd do a mexican style full works with salad and tex mex things in a baguette longer than any shitty tiny subcrap that you buy nowadays all for £1.30.

I never have jackpotatoes for lunch, just doesn't seem right. Like watching TV before 4pm. I'm sorry, I had a very old fashioned upbringing. We didn't have the TV on in the morning, only Radio 4.
Of course now, the inlaws have all sorts of crap on at 5:30am, reruns of X-Factor X-tra XXX, Jeremy Kyle, it's all bad, bad, bad.
So no, jackpot potatoes in the evening, yes, I like cheese, peas mushed in. No curry tikka stuff or coleslaw, that's silly.

So number one is the Tex Mex baguette thing from the Charles Street sandwich place near the Willie Thorne snooker club near the old Time Out which is not there any more. Neither is the sandwich thing. At this point the pedals, peasants, pedants, pedestals, pedantics will be turning in their graves .

Number two. The humble Mcdonalds cheeseburger. It's made from 99% kuru/Cjd/megaprion infected offal shit and 1% hyper sugar gherkin super dupa mega bloopa dressing. You'll go mad and start going bloop a lot, but it does taste really good after a hard day's slotting. Hmmmmmmmmm lovely megaprions altering the structure of my grey matter. Yum yum. Mclibel. Pah.

Number three. The homemade sandwich. Ah yes, a little bit of cheese and pickle. You do both wineploppers at Pewgort Gaswell Schlurvices and still baulk at the price of a MEGA WELCOME BREAK MEGA DEAL. Buy a child's drink for £4.99+VAT and get half a sausage free! (and a cheese and onion supercrisp). Ah yes, as you gorge on the pickletastic non kuru infected yeast activated bread matrix you'll say "Rah! I'm living like a King. LIKE A KING I tells ya.". I mean I'm not taking the piss here but that really somes it up, that lovely, on a roll in your own place feeling that you can get with this game. I was sitting on the verge of Dottington schleravices, near the truck bay, eating a sauna and tweetcorn bandwich. It was sunny it was June 07 blah blah blah. I was a king. A king. Living like a king! Love it. I was quite near a Burger King, but not a Reel King as it happened.

Number four.
The cheap pasty. It's full of nasty politically incorrect fat. The sort that NHS trust director PCT PCP types will poo poo as 'bad fat'. However it's basically a comglomerationypoos of cheese. So much cheese and so melted and onion. It's a hot flavarama. Bad for you, but at 59p fuck your PCT NHS trust 4.5mmol/litre total serum cholesterol thingymy innit?

Number five.
The reduced ASDA luxury extra special sandwich. OK you've just got a big BLOOPA for £120 on a hurble hurble game off a fiver, even so. Nothing like seeing an 'Extra special New York Deli gherkin, pickle, yang tang hickory chick cheese and poopety doopety pastrami sandwhich' on the shelf is there? Especially if it has been reduced from £3.49 to 36p. In fact it's so good, the saving you have made you can buy a new pair of jeans and feel like royalty once more.

Number six.
The tap water in an old bottle.
If you're drinking tap water in an old bottle, it's because you haven't got time to eat, because you have a RED HOT EMPTIER. Tap water in an old bottle has never tasted so good, especially at 100mph down the M1.

Number seven.
The beer and a burger. The breakfast club. Humble pub grub allows you to chill out and take stock without looking too keen. At first it may feel a bit Norman no matesy, but then look around and everyone is on their own. Thank God for dysfunctionality. Ha ha, you're winning as you're going to make £5 off that Cluedo. Bloop.
Maybe invite a friend and then dispose of them when you have finished eating.

Number eight.
The Mccoy chilli crisps + mars bar. You're in a rush, there's nothing more healthy than a packet of Mccoy chilli crisps and a Mars bar and maybe some Rolo cookies to really get the mix of high sugar/trans fat needed to sustain the rush of you know what.

Number nine.
The apple and tin of cold baked beans.
Why not combine anti-oxidants with essential amino acids? Why not indeed? AS you can see I have run out of ideas and am now talking rubbish, unlike what I was talking back there which was not rubbish but salient food based fact.

Goodbye.

has to be a pastie, theyre easier to hold!! :P

oggi oggi oggi pasties are the business,they do a breakfast pasty that no self disrespecting player should do without,fills the gap nicely till you find somewhere that churns out chips cheese and curry sauce (gorgeous).
if you not feeling upto food ,i find that a yazoo chocolate milkshake is the absolute best snake tonic you can buy.

YAZOO....my favourite drink of all time! althought be careful after shaking as when you peel the lid back it loves to squirt everywere usually resulting in you having to go home and change your shirt

Chicken balti pie is a favourite of mine from Wrights. Bit messy to eat though.

the humble chip shop pucka pie is in my opinion the finest range of pies in existence .
they've been around for over 30years and cant be touched, the holy grail :P

next has got to be ginsters ,,,, fantastic range and reassuringly expensive, the egg n bacon sarnies, a personal fave, as well as the peppersteak pasty.

closly followed by greggs ,,,,, you can debate the tastes of some of the offerings but you cant argue over the freshness


then we come to the shit offerings ,,,,,,,, and the master criminal here has to be pork farms, dont believe me, take their sausage rolls for example ,,,,,, you ca hold it up and see through the fucking thing ,,,,,,, all pastry and a thin layer of sausage meat, the pastys are no better, thin layers of paste as an excuse for filling

and dont even get me started on geo adams ,,,,,,,,,, just pure dump yet as expensive as a ginsters












sorry, i really need to stay out of services

i'm with trayhop on pukka pies,however they must not be microwaved,pukka state this on the boxes of the ones you can get at tesco ...............................but what do the skanky chippies do ?
THEY FUCKING WELL IGNORE THE ADVISE OF THE ESTEEMED MANUFACTURERS OF PUKKA PIES AND BLOODY WELL REMOVE THE FOIL TRAY AND SLAP THE PIE IN THE MICROBLOODYWAVE AND RUIN IT......
THE BAAAAAASSSSSTTTTTAAAARRRRDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


rant over ,relax and breathe .

PEPPERD STEAK PASTY (Ginsters) 60 secs in micro and some brown sauce OMG its heaven

pepperoni slice from bakers oven

JG wrote:They don't do that around here Matt, but they do do do doo doo do did a cheese and onion pasty thing for 59 bloomin' pence. Offer now expired, so don't even think about coming over here for a cheap pasty and a chance to empty everything whilst my back is turned.

Well playa food. Let's see......

Back in the day in Leicester, back in the day.....Charles Street, used to be a shop that'd do a mexican style full works with salad and tex mex things in a baguette longer than any shitty tiny subcrap that you buy nowadays all for £1.30.

I never have jackpotatoes for lunch, just doesn't seem right. Like watching TV before 4pm. I'm sorry, I had a very old fashioned upbringing. We didn't have the TV on in the morning, only Radio 4.
Of course now, the inlaws have all sorts of crap on at 5:30am, reruns of X-Factor X-tra XXX, Jeremy Kyle, it's all bad, bad, bad.
So no, jackpot potatoes in the evening, yes, I like cheese, peas mushed in. No curry tikka stuff or coleslaw, that's silly.

So number one is the Tex Mex baguette thing from the Charles Street sandwich place near the Willie Thorne snooker club near the old Time Out which is not there any more. Neither is the sandwich thing. At this point the pedals, peasants, pedants, pedestals, pedantics will be turning in their graves .

Number two. The humble Mcdonalds cheeseburger. It's made from 99% kuru/Cjd/megaprion infected offal shit and 1% hyper sugar gherkin super dupa mega bloopa dressing. You'll go mad and start going bloop a lot, but it does taste really good after a hard day's slotting. Hmmmmmmmmm lovely megaprions altering the structure of my grey matter. Yum yum. Mclibel. Pah.

Number three. The homemade sandwich. Ah yes, a little bit of cheese and pickle. You do both wineploppers at Pewgort Gaswell Schlurvices and still baulk at the price of a MEGA WELCOME BREAK MEGA DEAL. Buy a child's drink for £4.99+VAT and get half a sausage free! (and a cheese and onion supercrisp). Ah yes, as you gorge on the pickletastic non kuru infected yeast activated bread matrix you'll say "Rah! I'm living like a King. LIKE A KING I tells ya.". I mean I'm not taking the piss here but that really somes it up, that lovely, on a roll in your own place feeling that you can get with this game. I was sitting on the verge of Dottington schleravices, near the truck bay, eating a sauna and tweetcorn bandwich. It was sunny it was June 07 blah blah blah. I was a king. A king. Living like a king! Love it. I was quite near a Burger King, but not a Reel King as it happened.

Number four.
The cheap pasty. It's full of nasty politically incorrect fat. The sort that NHS trust director PCT PCP types will poo poo as 'bad fat'. However it's basically a comglomerationypoos of cheese. So much cheese and so melted and onion. It's a hot flavarama. Bad for you, but at 59p fuck your PCT NHS trust 4.5mmol/litre total serum cholesterol thingymy innit?

Number five.
The reduced ASDA luxury extra special sandwich. OK you've just got a big BLOOPA for £120 on a hurble hurble game off a fiver, even so. Nothing like seeing an 'Extra special New York Deli gherkin, pickle, yang tang hickory chick cheese and poopety doopety pastrami sandwhich' on the shelf is there? Especially if it has been reduced from £3.49 to 36p. In fact it's so good, the saving you have made you can buy a new pair of jeans and feel like royalty once more.

Number six.
The tap water in an old bottle.
If you're drinking tap water in an old bottle, it's because you haven't got time to eat, because you have a RED HOT EMPTIER. Tap water in an old bottle has never tasted so good, especially at 100mph down the M1.

Number seven.
The beer and a burger. The breakfast club. Humble pub grub allows you to chill out and take stock without looking too keen. At first it may feel a bit Norman no matesy, but then look around and everyone is on their own. Thank God for dysfunctionality. Ha ha, you're winning as you're going to make £5 off that Cluedo. Bloop.
Maybe invite a friend and then dispose of them when you have finished eating.

Number eight.
The Mccoy chilli crisps + mars bar. You're in a rush, there's nothing more healthy than a packet of Mccoy chilli crisps and a Mars bar and maybe some Rolo cookies to really get the mix of high sugar/trans fat needed to sustain the rush of you know what.

Number nine.
The apple and tin of cold baked beans.
Why not combine anti-oxidants with essential amino acids? Why not indeed? AS you can see I have run out of ideas and am now talking rubbish, unlike what I was talking back there which was not rubbish but salient food based fact.

Goodbye.

tl;dr

Chip cheese with curry from Mrchips. or a grezsy bergur