Fruit Machine Chat

These guys who drive these cars are the biggest wankers on the road.
Its like they are magically transformed when they get behind the wheel.

why? are you jelous you cant afford one?

I wouldn't want one if it turns me in to a twat

I know for a fact Audis aren't fitted with indicators or mirrors.

Pretty sure there's a twat exam you have to take before you buy one too.

One thing that baffles me on the road is the amount of fatalities. Why are there so many? and the only answer can be people driving too quickly.

Being from Cumbria ive seen a lot of examples of this on our mountain roads. There are a lot of narrow places where two cars have to almost stop to pass each other, yet people fly round these blind corners at speed. Must be a lot of accidents (and I usually read about them in papers).

I quite enjoy turning into a twat... ...so to speak...

pokerpete wrote:I know for a fact Audis aren't fitted with indicators or mirrors.

Pretty sure there's a twat exam you have to take before you buy one too.

You came across as quite intelligent in the past until that post!

I spend a lot of time commuting and if there's car too close to my rear end, a car cutting lanes without indicating or a car overtaking unsafely putting everyone else around them in danger, it's odds on an Audi.

I'm not sure what it is about my post you dislike or find 'unintelligent', but a week on my daily route would have you agreeing with it.

never heard so much bullshit in my life

It isnt just audis and mercs that seem to have total deadheads behind the wheel, although the majority of em are in those aforementioned brands of car!

I had some total twat in an older shape vectra sri 140 trying to give it the billy big bollocks on the way home from work today, came tearing up behind me after a few of us had overtaken a tractor and he decided to overtake the tractor and all the other cars too in one go, with cars coming the other way by this point as well, so he manhandled his way in between me and the car that was following me at a sensible distance (i think the car behind had to lock up to let him in) and then vectratwat decided to sit about 2 foot off my bumper, practically in the boot.

You could see by the look on his face in the mirror that he was one of these that thinks its his right to drive like a total fucknut because he's got "a sri 2.0 16v 140 horsepower innit" which is obviously so superbly powerful and fast that everyone should move out of his way, totally oblivious to the fact that a car had just anchored up to give him space to pull in in order to prevent an accident.

You may have a 2l 16v engine, but lets face it mate, a 2l engine in a fat lardy overweighted car like a late 90's vectra that handles like a sponge aint exactly anything special!

I was only doing just under 60 tho and this dick was really startin to annoy me being sat so close to my car, it was a nice straight road with no cars in the way, so, 3rd gear time it is then.....

A vectra produces 140bhp and weighs 1425kg

My car produces 120bhp, and weighs 940kg

Vectra boy looked really elated as he got out dragged by an old mx-5, haha!

I am in an incredibly bad mood today and that post cheered me up a little bit Clarkey, so cheers. JG.

I have an audi and never had to take a twat exam!That is what i find "unintelligent".Its almost like saying all muslims are terrorists isnt it pete?

i'm not sure if the ones who drive audi's are but remember these two in a jeep.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/.../Two-held ... trike.html

betchrider wrote:I have an audi and never had to take a twat exam!That is what i find "unintelligent".Its almost like saying all muslims are terrorists isnt it pete?

What the fuck are you talking about??

What does an obviously humorously intended comment on the general driving behaviour of owners of German road cars have to do with the level of extremism in the muslim community?
Seriously, what are you on about?

You have just given up the right to pass comment on other peoples intelligence with a post like that.

Take a deep breath and try not to take things so seriously.

Besides, you wouldn't notice Audis tailgating you because, as an Audi driver, you are likely to be the one tailgating.
Also, you have no mirrors.